Thursday, February 4, 2010

Really, everyone, I'm not that charming, so don't flatter me so much.

Holy cow, I have 28 new friends. The last time I made 28 friends so quickly, I was in a bar, raising shots of Jagermeister and insisting that everyone in the building were the newest members of my newly formed religious organization . . . a non-moderational temple preaching the indulgence of sauasage pizza, chicken wings and Mojitos. The church's political lobby would begin discussions with the surgeon general to re-define the four food groups as caffeine, nicotine, fats and alcohol.

Those friends didn't last and my days standing at that pulpit are over.

So, welcome, my new 28 friends, I'm flattered that you are here. Kathi ( answered my last post with an awesome way to "follow" blogs and get alerts on my dashboard when there are new posts on my friends' sites. A few people, offered insight to the my technical question and all are appreciated and do work.

Regarding my surgery situation, last night I attended my first of two post-op support meetings that my insurance company wants me to attend in order to cover my surgery. It was sort of a reality check for me. (remember from my openner, the term Fat Bastard is a non-offensive, humorous way to discuss anyone who has struggled with weight) I am starting to develop a theory that Fat Bastards can be split into two groups.

Group A, of which I am a part, knows the dos and don'ts of healthy living. We know to exercise four to five times a week, to avoid foods high in fat and sugar and choose a daily caloric intake based on factors of age, health, gender and lifestyle. We know this, we simply choose not to.

People in Group B simply don't have a knowledge of that healthy lifestyle. Honestly, I am not intending to be judgemental. I used to believe that information taught in schools, with the food pyramid in elementary school to the discussion of metabolism in high school health classes, was common knowledge. But as I sat in this meeting last night, listening to questions, this became apparent to me. One woman seemed shocked at the idea that there was a direct relationship between calories burned and calories consumed and that relationship will ultimately impact weight loss or gain.

In the end, I hope that this new knowledge for Group Bs becomes the beginning of a new life. For myself and the other Group As, we have a completely different issue. Why, in the name of Sausagito (the name of the God of my non-moderational church), do the Group As know exactly the right thing to do but fail to make the proper choice?

I plan to spend sometime this weekend catching up on everyone's blogs, see everyone soon.


  1. Great post! I cracked up and then nodded my head in agreement. I am also of Group A and actually have to stop myself from getting offended when people assume I know nothing about health and nutrition just because I am fat. Just like people know smoking is bad for them, having the knowledge isn't enough. Why? I have no idea. I wish I did - I'd be rich. And I'd even invest in the Church of Sausagito. :)

  2. make me number 29! i too am group A.

    i grew up in plantation. where did you grow up?

    follow me at:

  3. Another guily group A! I wish I had the answer, but all of us group A folks know all too well, that knowing and doing are two different things.
    Great post!
    "Band me Baby!"

  4. I am 100% group A. I also was an avid member and fan of Sausagito's church.

    I think the reason I always chose not to eat the right things or get a decent amount of exercise is that doing all the wrongs things were somehow comforting. It didn't matter that I was packing on the pounds when I was eating a plate full of fajita nachos, drinking a margarita, and inhaling chips and salsa surrounded with people I loved. I was having fun. Counting calories has never been and frankly never will be as fun as tucking into a huge Mexican fiesta.

    I cannot wait until my band will help me eat right (or at least smaller portions) without having to count calories.

  5. Another group A member here. I could probably recite the number of calories, fat, carbs and sugars in lots of common foods and yet seemed unable to limit my caloric consumption or control my portion sizes.

    I've been doing some research on nutrition and how our bodies respond to food and the adage of "just eat less and exercise more" isn't that simple for those of us with higher BMIs. Drastic changes in caloric consumption is often required to just begin losing weight.

  6. Yep, I am another group A person. I hate it when the support groups or nutrionist sessions "dumb down" the message. They forget that there are two groups of people out there. Plus not having the knowledge doesn't make group B dumb so I wonder why they act like they are talking to children...

    What is really funny is that I find mistakes in their own literature. After surgery I ended up not being able to go back to work because I didn't have any energy they told me I wasn't eating enough calories. I pointed out to them that if I stayed at the protein, fat, and carb levels they told me (and stressed) I couldn't get 1200 calories I needed. They looked really confused so I pointed out that since each gram of protein and carbs have 4 calories and a gram of fat has 9 what they told me to stick to was only 700 calories. Their jaws dropped... but they still haven't fixed it for the new people. Plus the new numbers they gave me still don't add up to 1200 calories. They are great at many things, but for the group A people I swear we know more than they do at times!

  7. I thought we were all As. Interesting. But "we simply choose not to" do the right thing is maybe not accurate. First, overeating and the reasons behind it are WAY complicated, not simple at all. In my case, and for many of us, I think, there was a little bit of food addiction going on - the compulsion to overeat was a real, physical thing. Not entirely a "choice" - sort of like an alcoholic. Of course they have a choice, but they are physically driven to drink, as well. This is different from "normal" people.

    So I always wonder what role this physical component plays. For me, losing that very real compulsion to overeat - that feeling that I "must" eat - has been the most amazing, freeing thing ever. A miracle!

    Anyway, happy to be your friend, FB. Love your blog name. I hope everything goes smoothly for you from here on out!

  8. Yeah, I think Group A's tend to find one another whereas Group B's are still circling the parking lot of life with their undeserved handicapped parking placard, wondering why suddenly all the handicapped parking places are taken.

    In my first pre-op class which discussed post-op nutrition, there were so many people asking the cost of the protein products and complaining about it. I got a little sick of it as the nurse pulled out option after option and they kept complaining. I finally offered, "It's always cheaper to stay fat," sarcastically. This was not welcomed well, of course. (And honestly? It's NOT cheaper being fat when you have the cost of special medications, and that if you buy as much 99 cent junk food as you want, that ultimately adds up to WAYYY more money than a huge tub of protein powder.)

    The first post-op class I attended, I let my mouth drop open when I heard one woman ask, "Do we REALLY need to get in 70 grams of protein after the liquid phase?" My mom went with me (she's a total health nut) and we looked at each other with our mouths open and simultaneously whispered, "Did this chick really just have the surgery and NOW she's asking this?"

    I think the key to being in the groups (and this is just a different way to judge those that you've labeled here) is that some of us are happy people who have figured out our lives and how they operate and now look in the mirror and think, "Oh shit! I need help losing weight!"

    The other group is still going to be miserably unhappy and clueless after the surgery. They're not going to know how to follow the rules. They're going to try to find cheat ways around things. And losing the weight? Is NOT going to make them happy like they think it will. They look in the mirror and think, "If I was thin, I'd be happy."

    Doesn't work that way, folks.

    Great to see that you're on your way to surgery, Jordan. I actually semi-quoted you in my first support group last Thursday night. About owning up to our names and our successes so that we can hold ourselves accountable for our failures. I'm still having trouble with that (at the dentist's office, one of the ladies said, "Oh, you look like you're losing weight already!" and I couldn't bring myself to say yes or how much, I just answered with "Well, I hope so!" *sigh* I need to get over that hurdle.)

  9. Great post! Like most who have commented, I am a Group A fat bastard as well. I wonder if the ignorance of basic nutrition is mostly skewed towards those who HAVEN'T been fat for most of their lives. Maybe people who have just recently gained a lot of weight later in life or after children, etc. never had to "diet" before so they didn't get the education earlier? Just a thought...

  10. I am also a group A...and it's interesting to me how I got here. A combination of hormonal fluctuations led and a decision I made led me to gain weight. But once I started looking like a fat girl, I decided "to hell with the 'right choice'...just eat". And that, of course, just made it worse. I've always known how to eat well and I've always loved to exercise. I was happy as a clam in boot camp, for example, and actually trained with the Navy SEALS for the three years I was in Hawaii so that I could keep that activity level up.

    Interesting and very observant post! You are just flat out awesome!